Friday, January 06, 2006
DimWittery Fairy Comes To DC Early This Year...
D.C. Council member and former mayor Marion Barry yesterday urged two young men who robbed him at gunpoint Monday night to turn themselves in to police, promising that he would urge authorities not to prosecute them.
"I have no animosities," Barry declared. "I don't even want you prosecuted, really. I love you. Give yourself up. Call the police. . . . I will do all I can to advocate non-prosecution."
Barry, 69, was held up in his kitchen about 9:30 p.m. Monday by two assailants who minutes earlier had helped him carry groceries from his car to his third-floor apartment in Southeast Washington. They pointed a gun at Barry's face and stole his wallet, which contained more than $200, his driver's license and two credit cards, police said.
"There is a sort of an unwritten code in Washington, among the underworld and the hustlers and these other guys, that I am their friend," Barry said at an afternoon news conference in which he described the robbery in detail. "I don't advocate what they do. I advocate conditions to change what they do. I was a little hurt that this betrayal did happen."
[sniff!].... I love you, man!
Bud Light Presents Real Men of Genius
(Real Men of Genius)
Today we salute Mr. Heavily-Armed Assailant:
A Real American Hero
(Mr. Heavily-Armed Assailant)
Every day we see you out working the streets.
Forget that nine-to-five daily grind. It's not for you.
Nossir... just a man, his "piece", and a primitive wild-west ethos...
Lordy, some things never go out of style, do they?
(Oooooh, baby!)
Sure some people say we should obey the law, but a man has the right to demand some respect.
(You are totally awesome, dude!)
You know, nothing gets R-E-S-P-E-C-T like a sawed-off shotgun, and what are a few laws when we're talking respect?
(We're all just one big happy family)
Best of all, it doesn't hurt you wid' da ladies to be known around town as the guy with the giant rod.
So crack opena few headsa Bud Light Mr. Heavily-Armed assailant, we'd like to shake your hand.
...but first... ummm...could you point that thing somewhere else?
(Oooh! Mr. Heavily-Armed Assailant)
8 Comments:
By 
Georg Felis, at
Fri Jan 06, 01:43:00 PM:
They say a Conservative is a Liberal who has been mugged. Since this did not work, “Mug him again” :)
Hat tip to Mr Derbyshire, in reference to Judge Bruce “Turn ‘Em Loose” Wright.
http://www.nationalreview.com/derbyshire/derbyshire020502.shtml
It is nice to see that the Mayor is trying to become closer to his electorate. He’s been arrested doing drugs, convicted, spent time in the slammer, and now has been robbed in broad daylight. All he needs now is a perjury conviction and he can run as the Democratic candidate for the President.
By 
, at
Fri Jan 06, 01:52:00 PM:
Is there something in the air along the east and west coasts that encourages them to elect losers?
By TigerHawk, at
Fri Jan 06, 02:03:00 PM:
Speaking as a midwesterner, born to easterners, settled in New Jersey, I think the problem is the huge number of confused idiots in the voting population.
By Cassandra, at
Fri Jan 06, 03:04:00 PM:
Marion Barry: a true man of the people...
By Lanky_Bastard, at
Fri Jan 06, 04:25:00 PM:
A man of the people, by the people, and for the people. Politicians like Barry are the sorry outcome of good democracy and ignorant electorates.
By Pile On®, at
Sat Jan 07, 12:53:00 PM:
I don't know why he is upset....it isn't like they killed him or anything. Because of our oppressive society they had no choice but to rob him to stay alive.
By Cassandra, at
Sat Jan 07, 10:50:00 PM:
It's like a jungle sometimes
It makes me wonder
How they keep from goin' under...
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