Monday, November 20, 2006
"Rumsfeldian" credibility: "CEO and CFO resign, company shares soar"
Being a corporate tool, I naturally think that most senior executives add huge value and should be paid accordingly. The market, however, occasionally spots an executive team that subtracts value. Under the headline "CEO and CFO resign, company shares soar":
Cyberonics Inc., the maker of a controversial device to treat epilepsy and depression, said on Monday that two top executives have resigned following an investigation that revealed errors in its accounting practices.
Chief Executive Robert "Skip" Cummins resigned effective immediately, as did Pamela Westbrook, the company's chief financial officer, sending the company's shares up over 22 percent at one point.
Ouch. I'm going to go out on a limb and predict that this is one news story that won't go in to Skip Cummins' scrapbook.
And then there's this:
"Investors are relieved that a CEO whose credibility had reached Rumsfeldian depths has finally gone," said Dr. Harry Tracy, publisher of the monthly journal NeuroInvestment.
Whatever one thinks of Donald Rumsfeld, we should all hope that the adjective "Rumsfeldian" does not achieve widespread currency.
10 Comments:
By 
, at
Mon Nov 20, 02:43:00 PM:
At the risk of getting labelled a Socialist, to us unwashed scrubs making less than 6-figures, there's something screwy about a system where you oversee the loss of half a company's value and still get a $1.7 million cash severance. (Not to mention the options). How many people wouldn't take the cash in exchange for some bad press?
JK
By 
D.E. Cloutier, at
Mon Nov 20, 02:50:00 PM:
Next, the word "Dumbsfeld" may become more popular, with "Dummy" as the shorter version.
By skipsailing, at
Mon Nov 20, 03:04:00 PM:
One must wonder about the make up of the board of Directors at this point.
While I understand JK's point, I really doubt that this 1.7 million will be the cure all for these people. Afterall one assumes that they scaled up their life style to consume all the money they were making. Had they lived modestly that golden handshake might have sustained them for long enough to gain a toe hold in a new industry, like oh say Long haul truck driving.
Isn't it the American myth that failures join the Army? I wonder when those two will show up at the recruiters office.
By , at
Mon Nov 20, 03:09:00 PM:
Thanks for linking to this piece, Hawk. I worked with Skip many years ago, then lost contact with him - I always wondered what happened to the guy. This piece added massive entertainment value to my Monday. He was one crazy dude, I'll tell you that.
By , at
Mon Nov 20, 03:44:00 PM:
JK,
You're not a socialist. You, like many of the rest of dumb "scrubs" who make less than 6-figures a year, are tired of being mis-managed by over-paid, over-rated fools, who make too much money and take Fridays off to play golf instead of taking care of business and their alleged "responsibilities" as corporate managers.
There are people out there who are demonstrably brilliant at running their companies and exercising their executive capabilities; but it's just like pro-sports. Once a few really excellent people make a ton of money, the mediocrities want the same, just 'cause they have a similare "title" or "position". It's like some kind of perverse "reverse" egalitarianism, run amok.
-David
By Dawnfire82, at
Mon Nov 20, 07:08:00 PM:
"Once a few really excellent people make a ton of money, the mediocrities want the same, just 'cause they have a similare "title" or "position"."
But then, isn't that how socialism works too?
"Bob gets this, I want it too even though I haven't earned it the same way that he has. As a matter of fact, I deserve it for free because when you really think about it it's a fundamental human right!"
By TigerHawk, at
Mon Nov 20, 10:19:00 PM:
JK,
I'm sure the severance payment was required in a contract that the CEO negotiated back when the board thought they wanted him around. Very few of these payments on termination are more than are at least arguably required by the contract or to insure an orderly transition.
By , at
Mon Nov 27, 03:31:00 PM:
Huh.Interesting. My wife has one of the Cyberonics implants to control her epilepsy. I don't know how "controversial" it is, as they've been doing this since the 90s.
It works, after a fashion. It hasn't eliminated her seizures, but it definitely reduced them.
By , at
Sat Apr 21, 09:25:00 PM:
Austrian Sigmund Freud is known as the father of psychoanalysis yet people have (mental) health problems because of their disfavor, illustrating the preditory purpose of this discipline, this individual.
These people.
Of course Hitler was Austrian. Glock, maker of the semi-automatic gun favored by the most ruthless of black street gangs, the Bloods and the Crips, is Austrian.
RedBull Energy drink Austrian.
The Holocaust was foreshadowing, yet another example of the Jews sacrificing to help the disfavored::::
1. 1492 exodus from Spain.
2. Spread throughout Europe as clue to heathen Christians worshipping a false god.
3. "Quasi-Holocaust claim" contradicting boss.
The Apocalypse (or an Apocalyptic event) will be initiated by an Austrian. When the national referendum to allow foreign-born individuals to run for president is introduced I recommend you DEFY and vote NO!! In the years prior to this vote the gods will send POWERFUL clues suggesting the IMPORTANCE OF DEFIANCE.
It will be the Koreans. There may not even be any invasion:::They gods will scapegoat them telepathically.
Black people like the ones who terrorized Korean businesses during the 1992 riots in California will be executed.
This time the holocaust will be black.
Italy's boot is a clue showing the god's intent with the Romans.
Oshkosh. Oshkosh is a clue just as Lake Michigan and Green Bay are clues::::
Oshkosh is the ejaculate clue:::Life springs forth from this city.
Expect your traditional Second Coming of Christ to come from Oshkosh, Wisconsin. Consistant with the possibility of matrilinial lineage it may be the mother's family from the Lake Winnebago area fulfilling some "Manifest Destiny" bullshit theater.
1. Corporate sourcing violently punished::::
They suggest the whole "sourcing" era, where it is positioned that their brain-less clones obtained product from China and other Asian countries for the lowest possible price, will be punished violently if the gods elect to employ the "Chinese invasion" script.
One of the reasons it was so important to get out before 1980.
2. Southern rednecks deception to blame for Republican control:::::
Republican loyalty is why noone cares that rednecks are set up for the slaughter.
Republicans, party of preditory disfavored, keep guns available. Easy gun availablility is an "open door" for the gods, a tool used to prey on the disfavored.
Republicans, party of preditory disfavored, gave you the Clinton impeachment theater 1998.
Republican loyalty is why noone will care when rednecks are slaughtered.
The Simpsons offered many clues to the disfavored, not the least of which the frequent references to "pack/mob mentality".
"We don't want Mexicans showing up at Temple."
Kosher is a favor bestowed upon the Jews. The South eats LOTS of pork and there is a oyster bar on every corner.
It's kinda like liquor stores in the ghetto. This is the kind of irony the gods laugh about:::::
gods got rid of the retarded woman who lived across the street, prior to the fall of 2006 so your handiwork wouldn't stare you in the face while there was so much attention.
gods took similar evansive manuvers w/ bi-racial.
Bill Clinton wasn't impeached because he lied.
Bill Clinton wasn't impeached because he was orally copulated.
Bill Clinton was impeached because it was 1998.
HOW TO PRAY:::1.I'm sorry for what I've done wrong. 2.I don't want to make any more mistakes. 3. I want to fix my problems. 4. Please don't hurt me.
We will ALL be held to the responsibilities entrusted to us, no matter what temptations contradict this.
This isn’t about reals and clones. This is about the brains and the brain-less.
This is the key which unlocks the god’s puzzle.
By , at
Sat Apr 21, 09:25:00 PM:
Austrian Sigmund Freud is known as the father of psychoanalysis yet people have (mental) health problems because of their disfavor, illustrating the preditory purpose of this discipline, this individual.
These people.
Of course Hitler was Austrian. Glock, maker of the semi-automatic gun favored by the most ruthless of black street gangs, the Bloods and the Crips, is Austrian.
RedBull Energy drink Austrian.
The Holocaust was foreshadowing, yet another example of the Jews sacrificing to help the disfavored::::
1. 1492 exodus from Spain.
2. Spread throughout Europe as clue to heathen Christians worshipping a false god.
3. "Quasi-Holocaust claim" contradicting boss.
The Apocalypse (or an Apocalyptic event) will be initiated by an Austrian. When the national referendum to allow foreign-born individuals to run for president is introduced I recommend you DEFY and vote NO!! In the years prior to this vote the gods will send POWERFUL clues suggesting the IMPORTANCE OF DEFIANCE.
It will be the Koreans. There may not even be any invasion:::They gods will scapegoat them telepathically.
Black people like the ones who terrorized Korean businesses during the 1992 riots in California will be executed.
This time the holocaust will be black.
Italy's boot is a clue showing the god's intent with the Romans.
Oshkosh. Oshkosh is a clue just as Lake Michigan and Green Bay are clues::::
Oshkosh is the ejaculate clue:::Life springs forth from this city.
Expect your traditional Second Coming of Christ to come from Oshkosh, Wisconsin. Consistant with the possibility of matrilinial lineage it may be the mother's family from the Lake Winnebago area fulfilling some "Manifest Destiny" bullshit theater.
1. Corporate sourcing violently punished::::
They suggest the whole "sourcing" era, where it is positioned that their brain-less clones obtained product from China and other Asian countries for the lowest possible price, will be punished violently if the gods elect to employ the "Chinese invasion" script.
One of the reasons it was so important to get out before 1980.
2. Southern rednecks deception to blame for Republican control:::::
Republican loyalty is why noone cares that rednecks are set up for the slaughter.
Republicans, party of preditory disfavored, keep guns available. Easy gun availablility is an "open door" for the gods, a tool used to prey on the disfavored.
Republicans, party of preditory disfavored, gave you the Clinton impeachment theater 1998.
Republican loyalty is why noone will care when rednecks are slaughtered.
The Simpsons offered many clues to the disfavored, not the least of which the frequent references to "pack/mob mentality".
"We don't want Mexicans showing up at Temple."
Kosher is a favor bestowed upon the Jews. The South eats LOTS of pork and there is a oyster bar on every corner.
It's kinda like liquor stores in the ghetto. This is the kind of irony the gods laugh about:::::
gods got rid of the retarded woman who lived across the street, prior to the fall of 2006 so your handiwork wouldn't stare you in the face while there was so much attention.
gods took similar evansive manuvers w/ bi-racial.
Bill Clinton wasn't impeached because he lied.
Bill Clinton wasn't impeached because he was orally copulated.
Bill Clinton was impeached because it was 1998.
HOW TO PRAY:::1.I'm sorry for what I've done wrong. 2.I don't want to make any more mistakes. 3. I want to fix my problems. 4. Please don't hurt me.
We will ALL be held to the responsibilities entrusted to us, no matter what temptations contradict this.
This isn’t about reals and clones. This is about the brains and the brain-less.
This is the key which unlocks the god’s puzzle.
