Saturday, February 04, 2012
Congratulations, you qualify for Preferred Taxpayer Status
Dear Valued Customer:
Exciting news! Because of your adjusted gross income and history of paying taxes, you qualify for Preferred Taxpayer® Status with the United States Government. We're sure you'll be interested in our valuable package of benefits. Preferred Taxpayers® enjoy:
Based on participation scale and public endorsement of the program, you may even qualify for Gold Preferred Taxpayer® Status, which entitles you to the following additional amazing privileges1:
These and other valuable benefits are available to you for the simple price of an additional one percent (1%) of your adjusted gross income. Just check the box on the enclosed Preferred Taxpayer® Return and send in your one percent. You're already one of the one percent, use it to become your government's partner today!
Preferred Taxpayer® Gold Preferred Taxpayer® and Fair Share® are registered trademarks of the Internal Revenue Service. All rights reserved.
1 Some taxpayers may qualify while still retaining their initial low tax amounts, based on sponsorship and endorsement contributions
P.S. WE LISTEN! Corporate Partnerships are available, but the terms are strictly confidential!
Exciting news! Because of your adjusted gross income and history of paying taxes, you qualify for Preferred Taxpayer® Status with the United States Government. We're sure you'll be interested in our valuable package of benefits. Preferred Taxpayers® enjoy:
- Priority tax return processing
- Quarterly prepayment confirmation
- Personalized concierge service for all your IRS inquiries
- An embossed Preferred Taxpayer Card, entitling you to special shorter lines at the DMV and the Passport office. Just look for the instantly recognizeable mustard yellow Preferred Taxpayer® Carpet.
- Ten percent off your first purchase of a medigap prescription drug policy (at participating insurers only, some restrictions may apply)
- A Preferred Taxpayer® Fair Share® pin, so that government officials will recognize your contribution to tax fairness
Based on participation scale and public endorsement of the program, you may even qualify for Gold Preferred Taxpayer® Status, which entitles you to the following additional amazing privileges1:
- Valuable early notice of corporations that the government may choose to bail out
- A guaranteed audience for your concerns about the proper method of transporting oil and gas in the United States, as well as other important policy matters
- Expedited treatment for your tips on potential tax evasion or audit strategies (you know how convenient this can be!)
These and other valuable benefits are available to you for the simple price of an additional one percent (1%) of your adjusted gross income. Just check the box on the enclosed Preferred Taxpayer® Return and send in your one percent. You're already one of the one percent, use it to become your government's partner today!
Preferred Taxpayer® Gold Preferred Taxpayer® and Fair Share® are registered trademarks of the Internal Revenue Service. All rights reserved.
1 Some taxpayers may qualify while still retaining their initial low tax amounts, based on sponsorship and endorsement contributions
P.S. WE LISTEN! Corporate Partnerships are available, but the terms are strictly confidential!
2 Comments:
By 
MTF, at
Sat Feb 04, 02:28:00 PM:
Is there a corporate partnership program available?
By MTF, at
Sat Feb 04, 02:55:00 PM:
Well, then, one hopes uncomfortable issues like...ummm... indictments (ahem) won't preclude participation.
