Thursday, November 17, 2011
Caption this! (Aussie rapture edition)
The official caption from this official White House photo is, well, not entirely persuasive:
President Barack Obama waves to people in the gallery after addressing the Australian Parliament in the House of Representatives at Parliament House in Canberra, Australia, Nov.17, 2011.
We all know that you, our endlessly clever readers, can do better than that!
Mime Expresses "Futile Yearning" by Reaching Schmaltzily to Grasp the Sun
"And I have a good move to the hoop with my right hand, too."
"I am the One we've been waiting for."
"Can I get an Amen, Brothers and Sisters?"
Then we fling pixie dust on the economy...
In response to a legislators request, the President ordered up a rain storm for the drought-stricken Northern Territories after his speech.
If that asteroid had come any closer to earth last week, I would focused like a laser and re-directed its course using my best organizing skills.
No need. Stay up there. I'll save them.
"Picture it, will you? A mural spanning the Capitol Rotunda dedicated to my legacy...with cherubs and rainbows and unicorns farting skittles...the whole nine yards...and Me, descending Mt. Olympus in a fiery chariot pulled by Boehner and McConnell...I'm still in the rough sketches by you get the idea."
"Yes, you can go use the restroom" *sigh*
"I've got it! I've got it! I've got it!
"And then Reverend Wright raised his arm like this."
Nothing but net.
"We're going to have all this
knocked through, and made into one big, uh, living room".
"And for my next trick..."
From my mouth to God's ear. You do pray to Jesus down under don't you?
The American President waves goodbye to his once-bright future.
The secret of my many successes? I raise my hand like thus, and the inspirations for creating a better world just flood over me.
Parenthetically,this is such hard work that I must vacation and play golf frequently to relieve the stress and avoid the temptation of a ciggie. I also need all the energy I can muster to crap on the US when I entertain y'all.
I just grab on to the bulb, and the world revolves around me
"And then I placed the sun in the sky. On the 7th day, I rested."