Wednesday, May 27, 2009
So, on arriving back to the parking garage at the Trenton train station, I noted that a douchebag had parked so close to my car that I could not open the door. And not because I'm fat. Behold, the douchebag's car:
Fortunately, I am limber enough to get in the passenger side and twist over the gear shift, a handy skill in a pinch.
Anyway, the Obama-supporting inconsiderate parking douchebag got me to thinking: Now that the One has staked his reputation and our dollars on the revival of General Motors, will college town academics and related hangers-on suddenly decide it is chic to buy and drive a Chevrolet? If not, why not?
Release the hounds.
I note with sadness that said VW driving douchebag is from PA. They must have missed the part about "clinging to guns and religion." Probably from Philly.
I expect they'll be trading in their VW for a nice GM/Chevy/Chrysler hybrid any day now. Or maybe an even smaller Smart Car. If they do, you'll be able to pick the latter up and move it out of the way next time they park too close.
I used to have a packet of fairly large very adhesive stickers that said something like "NICE PARK JOB, ASSHOLE!" that I picked up in a novelty store somewhere.
They looked great in the center of a windshield and were nice a papery...so you know they would NOT just peel off easily.
I would send you some...but unfortunately I have used them all up...gleefully.
I do believe I had business cards as a young man that clearly stated..
"I hope you don't f**k like you park, you would never get it in"
Very effective and proper. Now that I am older I would (and have)left the offending jerk a nice large dent in the side of the car shaped like the edge of my cardoor. Being a rather large, scarred, nasty old rugby player I have never really been snarled at in a way that would give me pause from losers such as this.
Now even more fun at liberal jerks loss..
Get a High-Lift jack (most jeeps have them on the bumper these days), put it under the bumper, lift the offending offal and kick it over 2 ft at a time to give you room. Pretty hard on the offending trash car but danged appropriate!
Honestly, I hope you left him a message. I've had the same thing happen to me twice, both times even more extreme cases than your image shows. I carry a small pocket knife and have for years, both times I left my calling card.
I have a question related to the other car shown in the far left corner. It also appears to be quite close to the offending car. I find that such a situation occurs in two circumstances--the douche bags that designed the parking lot assume everyone drives a sub-compact, or certain spaces (far too many) are designates "compact" spaces. Is it possible that the offending car was squeezing into a space that was left for them by circumstance?
I've found that liberals tend to be assholes much more so than conservatives.
For some reason, they feel they are above the law, they are better than you, and that they are the only ones on the planet at any given time.
Under the circumstances, I would have been mad and gotten out a pen and written him/her a message and left it on his windshield where he would be sure to find it.
That said, I find the commenters that key cars or get destructive juvenile and repugnant.
Key it. Start in the front panel, across both doors and down the rear panels. Repair costs of $1500-$3000 will provide the proper incentive to for corrective behavior in the future. Alternately, repeatedly bang your drivers door into his passenger door, which will leave a lovely dent.
Having said that, is that the yellow line defining the boundary of the parking space emerging from the center of your rear tire? Are you over the line?
So ... in a quick re-view of the photo, it appears that the lanes may be very narrow for compact cars. The 'offending car' looks to be parked over a white line on its driver's side, and the Tigerhawk car looks as if it might actually be parked on the line.
We might wish to search out more Rachel Lucas-like photos with 'area of concern' on them, highlighting the TH ride, to further investigate.
I recant on keying, and was only joking anyway. Letting the air out of a tire might work though. I have a 16 year old POS for airports and public lots, and have more than once had to enter from the passenger side. It happens.
As to your question, will Obama supporters now buy GM cars? Uh, no. And really, why are we even bothering with the idea that GM actually has to make anything? Let's just go ahead and pay GM not to build cars. Like we've done with farmers, paid not to plant crops or to dump milk or whatever. A much simpler program to administer I would think.
Looks to me like the Tigerhawk vehicle is parked over the line.
Geez. Life happens. Anyone who deals with life's little irritations by committing a crime is not a rational person. Although to be fair, I do wish the person who came up the idea of the compact car space would be skinned alive and then set on fire.
Last year I noticed that aside from the little beater cars around the community college, Passats and Jettas in my town have the worst lefty stickers. There's a substitute teacher at my kid's school whose Passat had anti-Bush stickers on every window, including the windshield.
In contrast were the Priuses in my neighborhood bearing stickers like "Gun Control Means Hitting the Target", and "Just Say No to Communism" (the "O's" being little Obama logos).
TH: You actually could use to lose some weight. :) That said, the spaces in Trenton train station are very close together, and most people who commute are in a hurry, so my guess is that whoever parked next to you might not have realized that he parked so close to you. That's an explanation, not an excuse, as whoever it was should have been more considerate. The Centrist
To be clear, when I arrived I did encroach on the line so that I would leave enough space for the driver of the car to my right. When I parked, there was space enough between me and the car to my left that I was able to get out without dinging his door. When I returned, there was this new guy -- the dude who wants us all to know months after the fact that he voted for Obama -- who chose to park me in.
Most parking lots have adopted a clever new idea to solve this problem. They paint BRIGHT YELLOW LINES on the asphalt to show you where to park.
If you actually park IN BETWEEN the lines, you will have ample room to slide your fat butt out of your car.
For the past several months I have amused myself by counting domestic vs foreign brands in the faculty/staff lot where I usually park.
There are spaces for 87 vehicles. I have *never* seen a majority of domestic brands (and I even count that Vibe as American despite its Japanese ancestry).
Granted its largely the same folks parking most days, we have a MW and TTh schedule and I park there all those days plus evenings.
The usual breakdown is around 60/40 foreign.
Plus, I saw two Ron Paul stickers, many, many Obama stickers and not a single McCain sticker during the campaign.
Driving a Chevy to support Obama would actually cost the liberal something: they would have to drive a shitty car. Liberals really like costless or low cost ways of "doing the right thing." Things like boycotting Wal-mart, when they live in towns without any Wal-marts anyway.
Sotosroto -- "could have backed in". OK, fair point. Backing in to a tight space is pretty difficult, though. I'm not sure I would have the courage to do that.
Samuel -- It is a hybrid. But it has a "Christie for Governor" sticker on it, which makes up for it (at least up to a point).
TO the question "will Obama supporters drive a GM?" No. GM is guilty, perpetually, of building SUVs. It is an unforgivable offense. No amount of public penitence will ever remove the stain of that Original Sin.
I can't believe all the jerks who would want to key the car. What a bunch of narcissistic losers. "Ooh, he parked close to our car. Our royal person is offended. We will show him!"
Guess what? The guy who parked his car too close is a douchebag. So are you.
"To be clear, when I arrived I did encroach on the line so that I would leave enough space for the driver of the car to my right."
Sounds like the fault lies more with the parking lot than your left-hand neighbor. I am very conscientious when I park, always try to leave enough room around me for the next car whether parking parallel or straight in. But in some lots the spaces are so small I'm trying to shave inches on either side, even with a medium-sized car.