Monday, July 10, 2006
A Portland, Ore., man is suing Michael Jordan and Nike founder Phil Knight for a combined $832 million. Allen Heckard filed suit, contending he has been mistaken for Jordan nearly every day for 15 years and he's tired of it.
"I'm constantly being accused of looking like Michael, and it makes it very uncomfortable for me," Heckard said.
I've got a lawsuit planned against Brad Pitt on the same grounds- it's living hell being mistaken for this guy. I'm confident that the Fourteenth Amendment provides protection against this. Fortunately, the Stevens wing of the Court is still there to protect me.
I hope not. I see Baldwin (ata distance) pretty regularly out on the eastern end of Long Island, and I daresay TH looks alot better. Baldwin is usually sporting 3 days extra growth, and about 30lbs of extra girth. It is not a pretty sight.